How Husbands and Wives Move House.
So, as you know, we are moving house next week. I thought I would give you a run down of the process of the moving thought process behind our marriage, as this will be the fifth time we have moved house in six years, with 4 out of 5 including kidlets of sorts. It usually goes like this. I get a phone call from hubby at work telling me that his transfer to (xxx) has been accepted. There – that’s his bit done, his share of the moving thought process. I immediately start thinking. And planning. And thinking. And planning. And...
The Secret Ingredient to Motherhood…..
I think one of the biggest negative over-riding feelings of motherhood that nobody ever tells you about is RESENTMENT. The feeling that you cannot do ANYTHING on your own timetable. Your life is not your own any longer – it is dictated to by a small person who cannot be reasoned with and whose needs are primal. I know I have certainly fallen victim to resenting my children, my husband and basically my life as a whole simply because my own needs were not being met. I wouldn’t say I was ever depressed. but I can certainly see how,...
I'm a terrible, terrible housewife….
This is my clean washing pile. Well, it was when I took this picture a few months ago. Actually, its the G rated version of it. At the moment it is up to the Y in the word SORRY and is balancing on a knife edge of total collapse. I was at work the other day and knowing my total detestation for putting the clean washing away, hubby thought he would earn some sex brownie points. He folded the LOT and then sorted the folded clothes into piles for each family member. I arrived home to each pile stacked...
Vent Alert – shipping Mr Point Five off to the home for sick husbands.
Yesterday I posted this status on my facebook page. “Two Point Five Kids is of the opinion that sick husbands should be shipped off to a home for sick husbands until they are #8221; It was a big hit, with one reader suggesting they get sent back to live with their Mothers whilst they recuperate (what an AWESOME idea) and another reader saying she actually rang the hospital and begged them to readmit her husband after minor surgery as he was being such a sook at home. Now I am not begrudging Mr Point Five getting...
A post brought to you by Toddler Tanty #167
A Toddlers Paradox – a short story from the shops today. I have just done the weekly grocery shop. The bags are loaded into the boot and the trolley is unceremoniously shoved somewhere in the vicinity of the trolley bay. G Man has let himself in the car and has buckled himself into his carseat and closed his door. Yay for being Five. Master J has clambered into his carseat. I come around to buckle him in. He is struggling to shut the car door. NO MUMMY!!!!!! I SHUT THE DOOR!!!!! NOW!!!!! I explain that I need to strap...
Today I left my Husband….
I left Mr Point Five today. For an hour. If I hadn’t, I would have picked the fight from hell and he didn’t deserve that. I left an hour early for school pick up and sat in the car. I had a magazine to read, one that I hadn’t managed to do more than skim through the headlines for the past two months, but to be honest I just sat there. I sat with the windows down and breathed in the sunshine and the gum trees. I gazed at the wisps of clouds in the sky and watched the branches dance in the light...
Suck it up Baby!
How do you vacuum?? I have a three tier system. 1. Stuff that MUST be picked up and put away(useful stuff that will be missed)/thrown in the bin as it is too big to vacuum. This stuff is annoying and I often test the limits of what the Dyson will or wont inhale as I am too lazy to actually bend over and pick it up. This step includes CARPERPETUATION – (kar’pur pet u a shun) n. The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string or a piece or lint at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it...
Resolution shmesolution.
Oh my!! If I read another PC post on New Years Resolutions I think I may just puke. Lets be realistic here people…whilst world peace and a permanently clean house would be nice lets focus on stuff that’s achievable for little ole me. Here is my list of things I want to do more of in 2013. 1. Improve the sex life with Mr Point Five. The poor darlings romping has slipped significantly since having kids and I am afraid the product I am offering him is not what was advertised when he accepted my proposal of marriage. I’m sure the poor bugger may have...
Put the laundry away? Yeah, not gonna happen.
There is something wrong with me. Seriously. I am a grown woman. I have given birth to two children. I maintain a home, of sorts. I used to hold down a full-time job of responsibility. And yet, I simply CANNOT move the folded washing to the room it belongs to. WORST JOB IN THE WORLD. My nemesis. Apart from Boris. I wish I had OCD. Not Obsessive Coffee Disorder, I have that. I would rather go and change a pooey nappy. Or Two or Five. Than relocate folded clothes to drawers. Why? Riddle me why??? This is my clean washing pile. ...
Nag Nag Nag – GUILTY!
So, apparently women nag. We do. I am guilty. VERY guilty. I wonder if lesbian couples nag each other? They are women. Do they nag each other? Is one the designated nagger and the other the nagee? I’m willing to bet they don’t. I say this because at the root of every single woman nagging is a man irritating the absolute be-jesus out of her. A man who gets home from work, sits on his behind doing sweet FA, whilst the woman bustles about getting dinner ready, dishes done, kids fed and bathed, house tidied, all whilst her dearest husband...