I was banned from a Facebook Page yesterday for attacking and bullying behaviour.
Attack. Now there’s a word. Bullying. Another. Since when did disagreeing politely with a persons PUBLIC opinion become bullying? Since when is calmly saying, hey, I don’t think that was a very nice thing to say, considered attacking?
I will not own this and it shits me that someone else has branded me as such.
In NO WAY was I a bully or did I personally attack the writer. I just stated that I believed a statement on the page by the owner wasn’t a helpful or positive remark and although it may be her opinion, perhaps not all opinions should be shared in such a forum. In fact, I did not see ONE SINGLE comment which attacked or bullied the writer – people simply disagreed with her and said they thought in inappropriate, as I did. But you cant see these now as they were all deleted and soon after so was the original thread. You just have her word that she was indeed bullied and personally attacked. Pffft.

My theory is, if it isn’t helpful, nice or positive then don’t say it.

Opinions are like arseholes – everyone has one right??
Now the thing with having an opinion is knowing when to express it and in what forum. 
I have a LOT of opinions and my blog page is not the place for most of them 🙂 Now I could try and defend what I say by screaming “I was only being honest!! Honesty is a GOOD thing! Its admirable and awesome and makes me fantastic!!” But no, honesty is not an excuse for rude behaviour.
You’re fat. Oh I’m sorry, did that offend you? I was just being honest.
I really like her, but she so didn’t deserve to win that competition. Oh, do you think she will be hurt if she reads this? I was just being honest.
That baby name is really revolting, sounds like a strippers name. Oh your baby’s name is that? Did I upset you? I’m sorry. I was just being honest.  
And just because other sensationalist sites such as MamaMia promote a similar line of hurtful remarks, does that make it acceptable or right? No, it doesn’t. Everybody knows that. LAME-O justification of a very petty remark.
People can acknowledge that their feelings get hurt by being personally attacked themselves (as did the writer of this statement I commented on, after 100 or so people disagreed with her), but they see it as OK to openly attack others under the guise of being funny or honest??
Ummm, double standards police??
Perhaps one might even call the writer a bully and an attacker for encouraging her readers to gang up on a poor Mother and her choice of baby name.
This is my blog page. It is PUBLIC. Duh. That means everyone can see it and read it. It can get forwarded, screen shot and I have to be held accountable to its contents. I must be able to back up my opinion, stand by it and claim it as truly mine.  Because it is on a PUBLIC sounding board, I accept that you, my lovely readers have the right to agree or disagree with me. I can state my opinion on Gun Control in the USA, Smoking when Pregnant or Prank Calls on the Radio and I have done this. Sometimes, some of your comments disagreeing with me have made me step back and take pause. I know I am not always right and if I feel that perhaps, after listening to other points of view that I could be wrong, then I accept that also. Its not easy reading people opinions who disagree with you, sometimes vehemently, but as I have put my opinion on a PUBLIC forum, I must accept the good with the bad. I have the right to say whatever I want on my blog page.  This doesn’t mean I should. The only time I will remove a comment from a blog post or facebook discussion of mine is when they make hurtful personal comments about my family who cannot defend themselves. You don’t really know my family – you only know what I choose to share with you. It has only happened once and it was one comment.
  So, anyhoo – just wanted to put it out there. It shits me that I cant state my case directly on her page, but that’s what happens when you get banned I guess. The comment boxes disappear. Poof!!

Please don’t mention names. This wasn’t written to name and shame, and I actually really like what the page has to offer and I believe the owner has a good heart.  I have promoted it on my own page more than a few times as the charity work is admirable and I will continue to follow them.
I just want to say that its OK to disagree on a PUBLIC forum and we shouldn’t get our knickers in a twist if someone calls bullshit on our opinion. Its not attacking or bullying, its called debating and challenging someone’s statements and ideas. Making them accountable.
If you have opinions, believe in them. Stand for them. Own them.

And leave the ridiculous drama in the playground.

Oh, and Honesty NEVER excuses meanness.
Ever.