Who am I?

Joining up from Eden from Edenland for her linky blog called “who the hell are you””?

Its a little bit serious but I have had a few wines so all should be good.

Who am I? 

Hi, my name is Lisa.

I live in Cranbrook, South West WA, population 500 and this is the 5th house I have lived in in the past five years, thanks to hubby’s work.

I am a second time wife, first time mother and dutiful only daughter to separated parents.

My first husband loved his meth more than me and my second husband would give his life for me. Advice for those miserably married – you are allowed to make mistakes and its OK to do so. Marriage can sometimes just be a bit of paper in the end. Forgive yourself and go and be happy. You deserve it.

I have two boys, one is four and the other is 18 months. I know I have two children, trust me on a day to day basis its VERY real, but sometimes I have to remember that I have two sons. I feel 25 most of the time. I am in denial I will be 40 next year and if my husband throws me a party I will divorce him. I have done it before and I am not afraid to do it again. Well maybe this time I am, but don’t tell him that.

I am an only child and my parents divorced when I was 13. My mother has severe Bi-Polar with schitzo-effective disorder thrown in for fun. She has found a beautiful man to be her second husband and for that I am eternally grateful as I know my life would be very different if we had to care for her as well. My mother worships the ground I walk on and I adore her even if I forget to tell her when we talk.

I will never have my fathers approval. And I am OK with that. Having your heart broken by a parent isn’t easy to get through but it helps you focus on what matters in your life and what is important. My family of four is my essence – it is what makes me and what see’s me through every day and keeps me coming back for cuddles. every. single. morning. 

Did I mention I still cant believe I have children? The word “son” is foreign to me, even though I have two. I gaze at them in awe and wonder and am totally gobsmacked at their perfection – they are divine and I helped make them. Wow.

I have a degree – a Bachelor of Arts, majoring in Politics. It used to be framed and it sat on the toilet cistern. I think it may have been used when I ran out of loo paper. I cant remember. My job before kids was managing restaurants and I loved it. The pressure, the style, the flair, the sense of occasion and of course the wine after work. I miss it a lot but it wouldn’t fit in to my lifestyle now. That and there is no restaurant in a town of 500.

I am a SAHM – I make baby bouquets when I can afford to advertise and I am a terrible housewife. I love cooking. My house is often, always messy and I am very jealous of those with OCD. I wish I had it. Or cared more what others thought. Actually I do care. As much as it pains me, when my Dad comes to visit I make sure our house is shmick. Can’t have him being right can I?? Everyone else can take me as I am or watch me as I go.

I speak my mind, right or wrong, and I am not afraid to back up what I think. If I find that I can be proven wrong then I will admit it, maybe not so humbly. I am so NOT politically correct (despite my degree) and people often disagree with me or are offended by me. That’s OK. I know how to apologise and I am the first to do so if I think I am wrong or if I have hurt someone. Those who love me stick around for the ride and those who dont… well….it was nice knowing you.

I am dry, droll and really really silly. I laugh ’til I have tears rolling down my cheeks. I am compassionate, blunt and will give you my total love if I feel you deserve it. 

I lost my best friend (she didn’t die, we just had a major bust up and don’t talk) about 2 years ago and I will never get over that. I miss her every day. I know my hubby is now my best friend and he does the job well, but its not the same as having a girl one. You know. I miss having her as my BFF and there is nothing to be done. I dream about her a lot.

I am still amazed I have children – they are beautiful. I also cannot believe I have been given a second chance at happiness by my hubby. He is just amazing and most days I don’t know what he sees in me as post-children I am tired, grumpy and frustrated most of the time, so not the girl he fell in love with. And he STILL thinks I am gorgeous and he tells me every day. I try to see myself through his eyes – the view is good and I know it will get better – they tell me I will get solid nights of sleep soon. Who are they??

My taste in music is bizarre – I rock out to Billy Joel, Peter Cetera, Richard Marx, Simon and Garfunkal, Roger Whittaker, Bee Gees, Melissa Etheridge, Pearl Jam, Live, and the Beatles when I am alone in the car but if hubby is with me I listen to and like top 40 stuff. He is into punk-rock which I can tolerate but a whole album of Blink 182 drives me batty. I adore Jewel and would pay anything, go anywhere to see her live.

Cant stand ABBA.

I have a thing for numbers – I remember number plates of cars we had when I was a kid, post codes and phone numbers too.

I adore the V8 Supercars and Holden kicks Ford Butt.

I like my Eye fillets cooked blue, my oysters natural, my Champagne French and my wine Chardonnay.

I am driven by smell – I can recognise LOTS of different perfumes, especially those that were popular in the late 80’s early 90’s such as all the Estee Lauder ones, Eternity, Poison, Red Door and Sunflowers. I love the smell of wood fires and rain on hot roads. Sweet Peas are my favourite flower followed by Country Roses (Blue Moon reminds me of my Papa) and Hyacinths/Jonquils I could inhale for days.

I dont believe in God, I believe in me, yet I am blessed with my life.

Go figure.

Trivial stuff – I am a size 10, was a 6 before kiddies. I know you all hate me. I can eat an entire tub of cookie dough before it hits the oven. I love DWTS and MKR as reality programmes and Greys Anatomy is my fave tear jerker. I cry at dumb ads, when Goose died in TopGun and when Jack goes down with the ship. I still heart Tom Cruise even if he is an arsehole and Anne of Green Gables was my idol and go-to fashion girl in my teen years and beyond (yeah, I know, tragic). Titanic is my all time fave movie (I love the history of it alright???) followed very closely by anything with John Cusack or Nic Cage in it. Although I have a LOT of fave movies out there – thats a WHOLE other blog. I ask a lot of questions in movies. I know the entire two hour score of Phantom of the Opera and all 4 Seasons of Blackadder – dont listen to them with me, I am very annoying and cant help myself.  Bad grammar annoys the shit out of me. Seriously. Their, They’re and There isn’t that hard to get right. I have unfriended and blocked people for less. I eat chocolate for breakfast (hidden in my dressinggown pocket from the boys) and drink a bottle of wine a night give or take.  I adore my husband and am amazed by my boys.